Earlier this week, I signed my little man up for Kindergarten. While I was busy filling out papers and sorting the proper documents, my hubby took both kiddos into an awesome indoor play area for small children. This area is open during the week for parents to bring their young ones to explore their imaginations, play, socialize, create, and bond. I think it is a brilliant idea for such a safe place for play. Parents must stay with their children and participate as well, which meant while my kiddos played with other children, I was in the same area as other moms with the potential of conversing and making friends. I don't know why but the thought of making new mom friends freaks me out. I get nervous and jittery. I instantly start running all the conversation ice breakers through my head and toss them aside because they are all dorky and awkward. I feel like I am the nerdy girl in high school trying to sit at the “popular” lunch table. The feeling was not enjoyable and I was ready for it to end. So I did what any anxious mom in my situation would do. I kept quiet, and got out of there as soon as my kiddos began to get bored at their current playing station. Later, I decided to figure out how to avoid that nervous awkward feeling so I could make some friends in this new place. I turned to the all knowing oracles, Google and Pinterest. Seriously, those two sites are my go to whenever I have a question or problem. The answers I found break down to one major factor: you have to suck it up and break out of your comfort zone. Doing so multiple times will become easier over time and eventually you will hit it off with someone awesome. There are several ways to go about making new friends as a grown up.
|I got lucky with this bestie, she's my sister!|
- For starters, you have to leave the house. I know, I know, that means changing out of your pjs and brushing your hair. But hey, if you play your cards right, you might find a girlfriend that won’t mind wearing pjs while hanging out at the house, watching the kids play, and gossiping about a celebrity's new love interest.
- Find a group. When you finally get presentable and then get your kiddos ready to head out the door (so five hours later), try going to mommy and me play groups, playgrounds, or, like in my case, the early learning center. Chances are pretty high other moms will be there! So your odds of making a friend have already increased exponentially! (Or if you want to break out of the mommy groups, try gym classes or craft groups; whatever interests you! There is bound to be a group)
- Determine who to approach. There are a few ways to go about this. Like high school, people still travel in little cliques. However, in my research, there are still a lot of women struggling to make friends as a mom. If you notice a mom somewhat on her own and your child is playing well with her child, then starting a conversation could be way easier. Plus the kids getting along may make it easier to set up a play date, or mommy get together, in the future.
- Break the ice. Now here come the big scary step. The step that takes you out of your comfort zone. You have to say hello. Starting a conversation may seem daunting but you already have something in common, being a mom. The topics are endless when it comes to motherhood! How many books, magazines, shows, and even blogs make their bread and butter talking about being a mom? A LOT! Just say Hello and follow their lead.
|This bestie is going to kill me for this picture!!|
Basically, making friends as a mother, is a lot like dating. You pretty yourself up, find a good pick up location, make the awkward first hellos, and then make future plans. Things might not work out well at first, but eventually (hopefully) you will find the perfect fit; The mom with a similar parenting style, same taste is gossip magazines and wine, and will offer trading babysitting services instead of hourly rates.
Where is your favorite spot to make new friends?